I was having a conversation with an acquaintance one day and the topic of future life plans came up. I proceeded to share some things with this individual about what I hoped to do and I was met with what felt like an anvil! You remember that thing, right? That thing that always seemed to fall out the sky in Looney Tunes cartoons and smash what seemed to always be the Coyote. (Gen Z’ers….look it up!)

People mean well. I get it. But the older (and wiser) I get, I can also understand why so many dreams and goals get smashed underneath the anvil of discouragement. 

“Why are you going to do that?” “How will that work?” “And you’re doing that becauusssee…?”

Ever been met with “discouraging encouragements?” 

Have you ever been in a situation where you got evaluated or were told you did 9 out of 10 things well but you needed to work on just 1 thing? Isn’t it amazing how you ruminate more on the 1 than the 9? A similar thing is happening in our brains when we’re met with unintentional discouragement. It causes us to doubt all the positives of what we’ve set out to do, and instead magnify the negatives. 

So, what is the solution to staying the course when it comes to living within your purpose in life? Learn to tell yourself to “Shhhhh.” 

I’m a fan of small circles. Small circles can be lonely at times, but when done correctly, they are safe, encouraging, and peaceful. The small circle idea is really about just having a few close, very trustworthy people in your life that you share what’s most important to you with regularly.

Encouraging others to find their purpose is of the utmost importance to me, but I realize that finding your purpose doesn’t just happen overnight. Often, it’s a process, and it’s a matter of implementing small, positive habits daily until they become a way of life.

I pray you stay encouraged to find and live out your God given purpose. It’s worth the journey, it’s worth the highs and lows, and it’s worth fighting for. But you must protect it. Whatever goal you are striving for, keep it close to you. It’s not necessary to share every detail with every person. 

If you’re finding that as of lately you’re often on the receiving end of “discouraging encouragement,” that may be a signal that it’s time to take a breather and Shhhhhh. 🙂


“….a time to be silent, and a time to speak.” Eccelesiates 3:7 NIV

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